I tried so hard and I did so well. At least that's what I thought. Until I hear something from him, my world goes crumbling down once again. For the past two weeks, I put on my ego and walls up high, with no intentions to call/text him. Until I heard something from him, someone passed his message. Asking where have I been, why didn't I find him and all that nonsense. Yet all I wanted to do was just avoid those questions, he ended up calling me anyway. I forgot to bring that phone out and he didn't bother to call my other number anyway.
Agreed to meet later, but again? Disappointed. It's always like that isn't it? I always for fall the same reason, the same thing. I told myself so many times that I'd really forget him. He's not worth it even though he's given me so much to remember. But at the same time, he's given me so much pain. I've tried every thing I could, but at the end. Just his voice, his message, it's enough for me to forget everything I told myself, and all the effort I put into forgetting him. Maybe he was right "isn't not seeing me one of your new years resolution?" Indeed I shall make it one of my new years resolution.
Angry at myself, all the time. For the same reason. And it seems so difficult to seek for happiness. But it's alright. My time will come, I believe.